But He Said Everything Right
Once upon a time, when I was much less wise than I am now I would break up with guys who said the wrong thing. Not just any little thing, but big things. I'm a wordy person. Verbal and written communication are heavy weights for me, and I have a tendency to judge others on their use of words.
Now I recognize that I may have been hasty or rash in my quickness to end relationships when hurtful or questionable words came into play. I know that I've thrown away possible relationships that could have helped me grow and learn.
I suppose this is a roundabout curse of being a woman with a healthy relationship with her father. My father never made me feel unloved. He gave me a stable environment. He made sure I knew I am important and that I deserve nothing short of absolute respect. None of these things are bad and my heart goes out to the girls who never received these things from their fathers. But, I'm beginning to recognize that my high standards, though good and attainable, haven't been measured by a proper measuring stick.
What you say can mean everything. It can tell someone so much about who you are. What you say can be a direct and honest reflection of how you really feel. But if and when those words don't match up with your actions then and there your words die.
And, on the flip side, if your words fumble, if you are trying to say something and it's coming out wrong, but your actions prove that your heart is in the right place, then words aren't necessary.
I've learned, gratefully, and hopefully before it's too late for me, that it's better to judge someone for who they are (aka what they are doing and trying to do and be) than just on what they say.
Now I recognize that I may have been hasty or rash in my quickness to end relationships when hurtful or questionable words came into play. I know that I've thrown away possible relationships that could have helped me grow and learn.
I suppose this is a roundabout curse of being a woman with a healthy relationship with her father. My father never made me feel unloved. He gave me a stable environment. He made sure I knew I am important and that I deserve nothing short of absolute respect. None of these things are bad and my heart goes out to the girls who never received these things from their fathers. But, I'm beginning to recognize that my high standards, though good and attainable, haven't been measured by a proper measuring stick.
What you say can mean everything. It can tell someone so much about who you are. What you say can be a direct and honest reflection of how you really feel. But if and when those words don't match up with your actions then and there your words die.
And, on the flip side, if your words fumble, if you are trying to say something and it's coming out wrong, but your actions prove that your heart is in the right place, then words aren't necessary.
I've learned, gratefully, and hopefully before it's too late for me, that it's better to judge someone for who they are (aka what they are doing and trying to do and be) than just on what they say.
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