#1 thing I learned in 2013

1. Happiness is an arbitrary and ultimately meaningless concept. And it doesn't matter as much as everyone says it does. 

There is nothing that will kill happiness quite like the "pursuit" of it. If your main concern in life is to be "happy" (whatever that means) you'll most likely end up selfish and unhappy.

I'd much rather be around a sad, kind person than a concerned-primarily-with-his-own-happiness-a-tron. Kindness goes a long way, whereas "happiness", at least the kind most people are worried about, is pretty limiting.

The idea that "not being happy" is proof that you're in the wrong place, with the wrong people and therefore you must get out of that place and away from those people is such a pervasive and destructive lie.

How many marriages end because of the "we just aren't happy anymore" excuse? How many people quit jobs foolishly before they have another because they just "aren't happy with it"? (I'm a guilty party of this and it turned out nothing like it does in movies and inspirational books, I'm just still unemployed.)

Happiness is, by nature, fleeting. If it were anything but fleeting, we wouldn't notice it anymore and then it'd be rendered inadequate. Like a drug. Yes, happiness is like a drug that people are willing to do stupid, selfish things trying to get a hold of it only to find themselves left disillusioned and alone.

The best you can really shoot for on a regular basis is being content.

That sounds lame and wholly unromantic, but being content is  a choice that requires a lot of hard work. Being content makes moments of stress and sadness not seem so all-encompassing. You are far more likely to bounce back from those times of tragedy and disappointment that will come, no matter what you do, if you are content to be content.

If you're expecting to be in a good mood, laugh constantly and live in peaceful bliss all the time, you're going to be bitterly disappointed-- or the world's biggest flake-- and everyone will hate you (like Justin Bobby from The Hills).

Being content means that you are ready for what comes, bad or good. You embrace it and don't come unhinged and leave your husband on a whim.