Meeting Your Match: The Metaphor of Boxing

"The champion just wants a Challenger that just might have the strength to[ match him]."

Any serious athlete doesn't want an easy win. If you're an athlete worth anything you want to meet your match: That Challenger that just might have the strength to beat you. And if they don't and you come out on top it'll mean something, it'll mean you accomplished something.

The picture above is of one of my favorite WWII stories. It is of American Joe Louis and German Max Schmeling. On June 19, 1936 Louis and Schmeling fought a highly anticipated match in which the German knocked out the American on American soil after seven rounds. The defeat was humiliating for the nation and a little too encouraging for Hitlerism and racism in Germany. In 1938 Germany and Schmeling agreed to a rematch in which Louis knocked Schmeling clean out in the first round. Schmeling didn't digress as a fighter, he was at the same level as he was two years prior but Louis had risen to the challenge, worked harder to better his skills and ultimately fought one of the most impressive fights in boxing history. Not to mention win respect and pride for America and African Americans. And to add a feel good feeling not in relation to beating a war opponent it's interesting to know that Schmeling ultimately decided to oppose Nazism and later became a good friend of Joe Louis' and even paid for a portion of Louis' funeral in 1981.

You may be asking yourself what "meeting your match" has to do with relationships (you knew this was coming)? Well, all I want to do is meet my match. Now, I don't want to take the metaphor of boxing too far, obviously I have no desire to get my clock cleaned and I am definitely not cheesy enough to believe that I have some mystical magical "perfect match" out there. What I mean is I want someone who matches me on intellect, sense of humor, spirituality, temperance and on the shallow end: physical appearance. Now, quite frankly I don't think this is asking for too much considering I would bring the same things to the table. I want this because then this person will inspire me to push myself to be better and I won't spend my time dragging them along and they won't completely intimidate me. Is that too much to ask for? Apparently, society and social order says YES! Ugh! Why?

There is this annoyingly fascinating... or is fascinatingly annoying... social characteristic that says that men are the reachers and women are the settlers. It's this completely bizarre social order that says that I need to settle and I don't understand it. Example: lets say there is a very very attractive aka "Hot" "popular" man in my class/office/whatever that I like to stare at, I'll never ever be good enough for this guy. Now, this isn't a cry for self-esteem and I'm not beating myself down or anything all I'm saying is the truth. If the guy is in anyway, regardless of how slight, more physically attractive than me he won't notice me because I'll never be hot enough, slutty enough, perfect enough, popular enough nor good enough at pretending to like the same things that he does as the girls he's staring at. He's just out of my reach.

Now there are the middle grounders, like me. The handsome men with the calm and sweet personalities. For whatever reason these guys (and the female equivalent) have a tendency to lean more towards unrealistic insecurities. These guys are always the ones that tell me that I'm too intimidating... what? Why? But we're on the same playing field!?!

Then there are the more random of men who fall into the "cute" category both physically and personality wise, and what do they want? Hot girls. Naturally.

Then there are the more awkward variety. This is the kind that typically go for me. Now maybe this is mean of me, and maybe I have too high of an opinion of myself, but these are usually the guys that are 100% convinced that I am the one for them and I keep wondering why they think I should be interested. We don't have similar personalities, we don't have similar opinions, we don't have similar interests, we don't even match up on the good-lookin scale.

Really? Why? What? I'm so confused. I just want my match. I don't want that guy that I stare at in class. What would I do with him once I had him? Stare some more? And I don't want that guy that inspires the fight or flight reflex either. Someone that is neither better than me nor someone I settled for out of desperation. I don't want to be dragging someone behind me for the rest of my life (aka the easy "win") and I don't want to constantly feel like I'm not measuring up. I just want to meet my match so I can constantly improve with the said individual.

Honestly! Is that too much to ask for?!?!

Do you exist? Maybe that's the better question.